The Old Fashion Wife

             I don't know about you, but Kelly Clarkson has got to be one of my most favorite artist of all time. Of course no one will trump Barbra Streisand for me. But Kelly just may be a close 3rd. 2nd being Nsync...yes I still jam out to them any chance I get! Anyways, back on topic. Kelly has a song she released in her second most recent album called "Piece by piece". I just love it. If you haven't listened to it, please do. It tells about her dad abandoning her and how he messed up her view on men. But that her husband "piece by piece" showed her what a real man was. Now you may be wondering, Whitney why are you writing about this when you have a present and VERY loving, supportive father? Well it has nothing to do with my dad. I guess, maybe a little. But it's more of a bragging about my dad tbh! But this post is mainly about my husband and the love I have for who he is. Now let's begin with a backstory!           ...

             The space between deciding to try for a baby and finding out I was pregnant was a very short period. Garrett and I decided we wanted to get pregnant in June then found out in July that we were pregnant. The entire time we were trying I really thought I was fully prepared to have a baby. Then like most women, during pregnancy reality set in. A TINY HUMAN IS GROWING. IN MY WOMB. AND THEN I'LL WILL BE RESPONSIBLE FOR IT. FOREVER. Wow. But oddly enough I feel that before I got pregnant, my confidence in raising a child was accurate. Having a baby is hard, but I took every opportunity to help with my nieces to really feel prepared. I knew that I knew a lot of tips and tricks that most new mom's wouldn't. But there were a lot of things I was NOT aware of. Here are 5 things I wish I knew before having a baby.              Postpartum Depression and Anxiety are such common things. If you are a mom who hasn't deal...

             Teething, crawling, baby food, oh my! Wow! Time is flying and I can't hold on the moments tight enough! One minute, my baby is picking his head up, now he's getting up on all 4's and attempting to crawl! How crazy! I don't know if I can help it. So here is my update to what Hudson has been up to, and how we've been dealing with everything.             Teething has been relatively smooth other than a few days lol. My mom would read this and roll her eyes and go "...oooookay." But there way one night in particular that was just hell. Oh gosh. I hadn't slept a ton for the few days before this night and Hudson was in such bad pain that he just would not stop crying. I gave him everything I could think of to help, but nothing helped. I felt like I was going insane. I've learned that I reaaaally need my sleep. And having none of it was just about to push me over the edge. But once you push through just the few days...

             Before Hudson was born I realized something about myself as a mother. It was something I didn't expect from myself. I am usually very high strung and controlling. But as I was approaching my due date I realized I was very confident in the things I'd decide to do.              I have been so confident in my decisions as a mother. I would like to lay out my thinking in my mothering instincts so far. I am confident that my Heavenly Father will guide me in motherhood adventures. My Father in Heaven will allow me to know what is best for MY child. Now I must say, I in no way judge any other mother for what they decided is best for their child. I have been judged because people assume I judge them because of my decision. Which hurts because I do profess how amazing my experiences with my decisions have been. But I would NEVER judge another mother for her decisions.             ...

             The first few weeks of Hudson's life were a blur! I, without a doubt believe that going natural for childbirth gave me this adrenaline rush. A high if you will. Every woman I'd seen right after she'd given birth looked like they'd just went through a tornado. But right after I'd delivered Hudson MAN I was ready to eat, talk for hours, play a game, SOMETHING! But everyone kept saying "Get your rest! You must be so tired!" And I sit there thinking "Nope. I'm really not..." But...by Day 2 I was definitely exhausted. I couldn't sleep in the day because...well I just couldn't. I'd try and fail. But at night the getting up every 2-3 hours to feed Hudson wasn't enough time for me to go back to sleep again. I felt like a walking zombie.              I tell people how amazing Hudson. And he really was. But I feel I forget to mention how much I stumbled. I am proud of myself. I feel I prepared myself the best I co...

             I was so excited to be pregnant. I thought I'd be so cute. Honestly? I was not! LOL No shame either. I didn't show nearly as much as I thought I would or like other people do. Seriously. 39 weeks I was the same size as most women at the middle of their 2 trimester. Hudson carried very much in my back. Although I didn't show as much as I wanted to, my pregnancy was amazing. I didn't get nauseous or morning sickness once. I did lose my appetite during my first trimester. And I literally can't eat if I don't want to. So I had a hard time eating. But my sweet husband would constantly drive me around to find anything that sounded good.              So I went into one of my Dr. appointments at 39 weeks and was checked to see how much I was dilated.  I had been having some pretty intense Braxton hicks. My Dr. checked me and said I was 3 cm dilated. He was so excited & my Dr. isn't very expressive. But ...

             Ever since I was a little girl I knew exactly what I wanted out of my life. I'm sure most little girls have this daydream in their heads. But I craved it. It was mostly all I could think about. I had a clear vision. I wanted to get married young. I wanted my husband that held the priesthood and would marry me in the temple. Making our marriage a bond that would last passed death, leading us into eternity hand in hand. I wanted to have kids young. I wanted to be a stay at home mother. I wanted to support my husband in his dreams and career.              Unfortunately as I got older the people my age started to find other dreams. Leaving mine to seem like an immature, unambitious, and silly dream. I often felt like something was wrong with me. It was hard for me to find friends around my junior and senior year. Everyone's views on marriage and what a woman should be was changing while I had this same dream...

            If I ever decide to make this blog public then you guys will be getting lots of random thoughts that will mean nothing to you. I am so thankful today. Actually I've been thankful for this particular thing for awhile. What matters most? What makes everyone the most happy? And why does it make us so happy and grateful for life?             Family will always be the most important thing in life, besides the gospel of Jesus Christ. Family is the a huge part of what makes life meaningful. Family is something we all look for. If anyone tries to say they don't crave and desire it, are kidding themselves. We dream of a perfect Christmas or Thanksgiving with a loving family. Laughing and just enjoying each others company. Family is always going to be the american dream. The dream in general.             Now. Let me tell you a little bit about my family. My maiden name is Stockton. The Stockton...

            I know no one will see these posts. But here are some thoughts I'm having tonight. I'm having a lot of thoughts about motherhood. I guess I'm just very very anxious for my baby to get here. I want to love him. I want to cuddle him. I see my niece's Audrey and Camilia and they literally bring so much joy to me. Whenever I am sad, I have had to really try hard to not let my thoughts of "no one wants you around" get in the way of doing this, I ask AnnMarie if I can come over to play with Audrey. I like to think I'm her favorite aunt :) lol. But seeing them just makes me crave my baby boy to be in my arms even more. I anticipate the day that I will be able to hold him in my arms for as long as my heart desires.             One thing that is extremely surprising to me is seeing the girls I was in young women's, girls camp, and high school with. Not that I'm so far in life or bragging. But they all are in school, just ge...