This Is Me!
I have yet to meet 1 person who didn't like The Greatest Showman! My husband and I still can't stop listening to the sound track. It has so many lesson someone can learn from it. To not let money and fame be your main focus in life. That family is all the matters. You can find "your people" in life. You don't have to be ashamed of being different. That true love can defy all odds. Yet, the lesson that hits me the hardest is the title of my post today. This is me.
What a strong, unapologetic, and confident statement to make. THIS. IS. ME. No more, no less. A beautiful, glorious, and strong being. It makes me think about why this song has become so popular. A big factor is the actress who sings the song, Keala Settle. She is a standard for us all. Someone who I'd imagine has worked her tail off for her big break. And suddenly here it is. Happening all so fast. She may have almost given up. She may have thought "What else can I do?!" Yet here she is. Being who she was meant to be. Someone we all can look up to. She is brave. She is bruised. But she comes with the unapologetic statement "I am who I'm meant to be. This is me".
This has become an anthem for so many people for the simple fact, we all desire to love ourselves. Physically, mentally, emotionally, spiritually, and psychologically. We all could make a never ending list of things that we want to change, improve, remove, or add to ourselves. Because we want to feel at peace with who we are. To be set free from these expectations we put on ourselves. We could blame society, but each member of society is secretly criticizing themselves. It's the individual that needs changing.
I've said this so many times before but I have became quite proud and passionate about loving my body. I was surrounded by self criticizing people that I found that I didn't want to live like that. I purposely didn't go to the gym to make myself feel better. I didn't try to eat healthy. I sometimes just stood in front of a mirror until the "My thighs are so huge" thoughts dissolved and suddenly I was thinking "Well, I think my skin is pretty" and "Well my thighs aren't THAT big". Sometimes I wrote in my journal things I loved about myself, even if I didn't fully believe them. But seeing them written made believe it a little more.
Sadly though as that self improvement was happening, I wasn't paying attention to a vital part of me that needed loving. My personality. I was loving my body. But not my personality. My mind. I thought "No one likes you" and "You're so annoying" and " That's why you don't have any friends". My anxiety and depression hit when I looked around and felt those things were true. I've never had a lot of friends. In high school I had 2 friends I hung out with on a regular basis. And they both moved to different countries my Sophomore year. It was devastating to look around and not see anyone else.
I'm sad to say I've never fully gotten back up from that feeling. That feeling of "Why don't people like me?","Am I not a good friend?","Am I annoying to people?". I still can't come up with a reason I feel that way. Or why I feel like no one likes me. Except, if you can't find a friend. BE A FRIEND. That has changed everything for me. I may feel like my services, love, or words aren't returned. But I truly believe that at the end of my life Heavenly Father will be proud that I at least tried and never gave up trying to be a friend.
Why am I telling you all of this? Because I struggle daily to love myself on the inside. But I accept that THIS IS ME. I will drown the words of hate out. I was recently told very hateful things about myself from a grudging ex of my siblings & although I find the person completely out of their mind. I found myself analyzing why they would say what they said. THAT IS THE ADVERSARY. In this case, it was the adversary working through another person. But those thoughts aren't thoughts from God. Don't listen to them!!
You deserve the love you give so freely to other people. You deserve your respect. Your compassion. Don't go seeking some new way to make yourself feel better about yourself. Start with your own mind. And truly LOVE THIS YOU THAT YOU HAVE BECOME! We change constantly. And that is why self-care will be my life mission! To share it! To practice it! And to try and get others to do the things they need to, to make themselves feel good about themselves!
At the end of your life, you don't want to look back at all the times you were stuck in your own head about things you hated about yourself. You want to look back and think of the full, amazing, and truly inspiring life you lead for others to marvel at. Don't be so hard on yourself. You're doing the best you can. Be who you are! And don't be ashamed of it! Laugh real loud!! Hug someone tight! Be so upfront about how beautiful someone is! At the end of the day, you'll walk away feeling better about yourself. Accept who you are. And NEVER let anyone else tell you otherwise!
What a strong, unapologetic, and confident statement to make. THIS. IS. ME. No more, no less. A beautiful, glorious, and strong being. It makes me think about why this song has become so popular. A big factor is the actress who sings the song, Keala Settle. She is a standard for us all. Someone who I'd imagine has worked her tail off for her big break. And suddenly here it is. Happening all so fast. She may have almost given up. She may have thought "What else can I do?!" Yet here she is. Being who she was meant to be. Someone we all can look up to. She is brave. She is bruised. But she comes with the unapologetic statement "I am who I'm meant to be. This is me".
This has become an anthem for so many people for the simple fact, we all desire to love ourselves. Physically, mentally, emotionally, spiritually, and psychologically. We all could make a never ending list of things that we want to change, improve, remove, or add to ourselves. Because we want to feel at peace with who we are. To be set free from these expectations we put on ourselves. We could blame society, but each member of society is secretly criticizing themselves. It's the individual that needs changing.
I've said this so many times before but I have became quite proud and passionate about loving my body. I was surrounded by self criticizing people that I found that I didn't want to live like that. I purposely didn't go to the gym to make myself feel better. I didn't try to eat healthy. I sometimes just stood in front of a mirror until the "My thighs are so huge" thoughts dissolved and suddenly I was thinking "Well, I think my skin is pretty" and "Well my thighs aren't THAT big". Sometimes I wrote in my journal things I loved about myself, even if I didn't fully believe them. But seeing them written made believe it a little more.
Sadly though as that self improvement was happening, I wasn't paying attention to a vital part of me that needed loving. My personality. I was loving my body. But not my personality. My mind. I thought "No one likes you" and "You're so annoying" and " That's why you don't have any friends". My anxiety and depression hit when I looked around and felt those things were true. I've never had a lot of friends. In high school I had 2 friends I hung out with on a regular basis. And they both moved to different countries my Sophomore year. It was devastating to look around and not see anyone else.
I'm sad to say I've never fully gotten back up from that feeling. That feeling of "Why don't people like me?","Am I not a good friend?","Am I annoying to people?". I still can't come up with a reason I feel that way. Or why I feel like no one likes me. Except, if you can't find a friend. BE A FRIEND. That has changed everything for me. I may feel like my services, love, or words aren't returned. But I truly believe that at the end of my life Heavenly Father will be proud that I at least tried and never gave up trying to be a friend.
Why am I telling you all of this? Because I struggle daily to love myself on the inside. But I accept that THIS IS ME. I will drown the words of hate out. I was recently told very hateful things about myself from a grudging ex of my siblings & although I find the person completely out of their mind. I found myself analyzing why they would say what they said. THAT IS THE ADVERSARY. In this case, it was the adversary working through another person. But those thoughts aren't thoughts from God. Don't listen to them!!
You deserve the love you give so freely to other people. You deserve your respect. Your compassion. Don't go seeking some new way to make yourself feel better about yourself. Start with your own mind. And truly LOVE THIS YOU THAT YOU HAVE BECOME! We change constantly. And that is why self-care will be my life mission! To share it! To practice it! And to try and get others to do the things they need to, to make themselves feel good about themselves!
At the end of your life, you don't want to look back at all the times you were stuck in your own head about things you hated about yourself. You want to look back and think of the full, amazing, and truly inspiring life you lead for others to marvel at. Don't be so hard on yourself. You're doing the best you can. Be who you are! And don't be ashamed of it! Laugh real loud!! Hug someone tight! Be so upfront about how beautiful someone is! At the end of the day, you'll walk away feeling better about yourself. Accept who you are. And NEVER let anyone else tell you otherwise!
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